Portrait of the Artist as a Young Girl

True story. There was a time in our lives when my parents were public figures.

They were also practical jokers. To prank the people who drove slowly by our house in the winter to peer at us skating on the small pond, they tied a rope around me, their youngest and had me “test” the ice. When I didn’t fall in, they sent my brother out, with a rope around him. And when he didn’t fall in, they casually skated out together in tandem, waltzing. Apparently, the looks of distain from the passerby’s faces was worth the effort.

Fast forward 30 years, I discovered the truth while my mom was recounting this story, that they “of course” had the ice tested before sending me out and assumed we knew this. Hence the look on my face—and here I thought it was my job.

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